Tales website getting into shape
Dueling Belgians

A few useful terms

The New York Times addresses the condition they're calling "drunkorexia," which they file under the Fashion & Style coverage. Alas, the story isn't about the subculture of partying supermodel hipsters in Brooklyn, but the combination of two medical conditions- alcoholism and anorexia. It's neither about fashion nor style, so don't let them trick you into learning anything.

If they're going to define new terms for combination disorders with booze, then I have a few to add to the lexicon.

  • AADD- Constantly losing one's drink
  • Drunksomnia- The inability to get to sleep without a nightcap.
  • Alcrophobia- The fear of drinking in top-floor hotel bars
  • Alcoheimer's- Forgetfulness due to excessive consumption of alcohol the previous evening
  • Postalcoholic Stress Disorder- Severe anxiety common amongst alcoheimer's sufferers, frequently resulting in unnecessary next-day apologies
  • Claustroholic- A person who only drinks in crowded bars and nightclubs on weekends
  • Agoraholic- A person who only drinks in empty dive bars
  • Aeroalcophobia- The fear that the plane will hit turbulence and they'll never bring the goddamn drink cart around
  • Schlitzophrenia- A person whose personality changes radically when drinking
  • Bingecontinence- The loss of bladder control due to alcohol consumption
Feel free to add your own NYT-worthy conditions in the comments.


Get Camper's Book: Tonic Water AKA G&T WTF.