Thujone Delivery Vehicle
Broke & Tan

Eye Contact Sports

Within the spirits industry, there is a lot of toasting, often at the beginning and end of dinner, while thanking the hosts and chefs, when greeting visitors, before taking shots, before moving to another bar or restaurant and then after arriving there, when saying goodbye, between courses, etc.

It can be a bit much, but worse than that is this the notion that you have to clink glasses with everyone in the room and look your fellow toasters in the eye. Sure, it's polite, but it's not always practical, especially when you're doing it 20 times in an evening with a crowd of 30 people.

Some people are chill about it, but there's always one dramatic chipmunk in the crowd, keeping track of everyone in the room, ensuring complete eye contact with every toast, and bugging out their eyes like a maniac so instead of a friendly "how do you do?" it's like a prison visit with Charles Manson. Stop the insanity!

I call new rule: Sticky Eyes. Toasting over and over is fine, but one eye contact per person is good for a whole  evening. After that you get immunity. At least that's my rule. You can walk around looking creepy all you want.


Get Camper's Book: Tonic Water AKA G&T WTF.